Chapter 48: When Dragons Fly and Rains Fall
"Uh… aren't you going to say anything?"
"About walking through the desert?"
: Seriously, explain this.
: Something clearly isn't right here.
: This is why EXs are in their own world...
: Do your job properly.
: You've completely lost touch, Kisaragi.
: Get a grip, man.
"This is just a silent desert walk stream. For a while, please enjoy the ambient sounds of the desert and the occasional battle with monsters."
: No, that's not what we're asking for!
: Technically true but still wrong.
: Nope. Just nope.
: What is this guy even doing?
: How is this a valid stream?
I don't get what they're complaining about. Didn't everyone say they wanted to see the deep floors? Now that I'm walking through the desert, showing it off while Kamishiro casually blasts monsters with magic, isn't this exactly what they wanted?
Kamishiro and I walk through the desert with umbrellas overhead, and I genuinely don't understand why the viewers are making such a fuss.
: Why is it raining in the desert?
: Why are you holding umbrellas?
: Are these two even serious?
: Have they completely lost it?
: "Honorary one of us," yet still lacking common sense.
: In some twisted way, they really are our honorary members.
"Rain? I'm making it rain, obviously."
I glance behind me at the silver-haired, dark-eyed beauty following us.
'Master, I think you're being a bit unclear.'
"Am I?"
The beauty behind me is Tenkū, one of the Twelve Heavenly Generals, a shikigami who controls the weather. Since the desert is hot, I asked her to summon rain to cool things down. I didn't think it needed much explanation.
"...It was hot, so I had her make it rain."
"Yeah, that's right."
: That's not the issue!
: The fact that you can just summon rain is what's strange!
: You guys are casually summoning weather now?
: Where did you even get those umbrellas?
: Casually controlling the weather, I see.
: And this is why EXs are... (n-th time)
"Is this really something to make a fuss about?"
"I don't think so. It was hot, so you made it rain. If it's raining, the desert's not so bad."
: The problem isn't just the rain!
: This level of absurdity…
: I give up.
: Asking these monsters to understand human logic is impossible.
I'm not using some ridiculously advanced magic to summon the rain, I'm just having a shikigami do it for me. They should just accept that as normal. If they start complaining about this, wait until they see the real battles with the deep-floor monsters, that's where things get truly insane.
"Huh?"
"Hm?"
While reading the comments and tilting my head, Kamishiro's voice made me look up. In front of us was a massive scorpion, its metallic body gleaming as it slowly approached.
: What the!?
: That's disgusting.
: Where did that come from?
: Isn't that way too big?
: That thing is terrifying!
"It must have been slowly creeping up on us. This scorpion can reflect light to blend in with its surroundings."
"Really?"
"...How do you not know this?"
"I never really cared."
Sigh... my head hurts.
This person has explored countless deep floors in various dungeons, yet she's totally clueless about monsters. She probably just blows everything up with magic as soon as she sees it, without caring about details.
: Take this seriously!
: How does something that huge camouflage?
: Why did it stop camouflaging?
: This scorpion is terrifying.
: It looks insanely tough.
"Maybe it stopped camouflaging because it started raining. After all, it probably didn't expect rain in a desert, though I'm not entirely sure."
: You're the one making it rain, genius!
: It's literally raining right now.
: Take down that umbrella before you start talking about rain.
: Absolutely no self-awareness, lol.
: Typical Kisaragi.
: We've come to understand him.
: Kisaragi is just recklessly casual.
"It's coming."
Naturally, the monster doesn't care about our commentary. Whether we're reading comments or holding umbrellas, once it spots us, it attacks.
This scorpion... it probably hasn't been officially named yet, given how few people have encountered it. It relies on brute force with its massive body, but it isn't venomous, so there's not much to worry about.
As the scorpion charged, Kamishiro unleashed a fire spell. Instead of a beam, it was more like a flamethrower, but the scorpion pressed on, undeterred, closing the gap between us.
: That's amazing.
: It's so dangerous, though.
: The viewers are way too calm, lol.
: They can't possibly lose, right?
: I mean, it's only the 74th floor.
"...Its joints seem pretty tough."
"Then maybe think before attacking—"
"—More firepower, got it!"
Without listening to a word I said, Kamishiro, being herself, unleashed one of her signature high-powered spells. The magic instantly froze the desert floor, and the rain turned into hail. I used wind to direct the hail towards the scorpion, bombarding its body.
With the ground frozen, the scorpion seemed to recognize us as a legitimate threat. Instead of charging headlong, it stopped and began to assess the situation from a distance.
"Can you handle this?"
"You're just leaving it to me?"
"Well, I could handle it if you want."
: Do they not feel any danger at all?
: Um…
: Where's the tension?
: They're way too relaxed.
: Is that scorpion really strong, though?
"If you compress your magic, you can probably pierce through it."
"...Compressed magic, huh?"
Asagao had mastered that technique, but I wonder if Kamishiro can do it too.
"It's something they've been researching in America. Compressing magic has always been thought of, but not many people had the talent to pull it off."
"Asagao can do it, though."
"Really? I'd love to meet her."
With a smile, Kamishiro began compressing her typically overwhelming magic. Normally, her spells are powerful enough to collapse dungeons, but now she was shrinking them down to an incredible degree.
"This is wind magic."
The compressed wind magic shot out of her hand with a sound like tearing air. An invisible blade sliced through the scorpion's metallic exoskeleton with ease.
"…Your magic is just as impressive as always. In terms of sheer power."
"Why do you sound like there's something more behind that?"
"Because there is."
: I was too stunned to even comment.
: These EXs aren't human, are they?
: Maybe they're actual gods?
: My theory is they're robots developed for dungeon exploration.
: If they were robots, they wouldn't be sneaking off to America.
"That's rude. To call a stunning beauty like me a robot? Clearly, this audience needs to get outside more often."
: Forbidden words.
: Excuse me?
: Did she just say what I think she did?
: This means war.
: You can't just say that!
: That crosses a line. Low-rating pressed.
"Please, don't say things that are going to get my stream downvoted."
"Huh? Why?"
What a carefree person. Telling introverts with social anxiety to "get outside more" is basically the forbidden card. Say that, and all you'll get is an enraged introvert sobbing into their pillow at night. I doubt someone as naturally extroverted as Kamishiro could ever understand that introverts are delicate creatures.
: Kisaragi, our hero!
: The conscience of the EXs.
: Isn't the real conscience of the EXs that salaryman?
: You mean the workaholic.
: Still, Kisaragi is one of us.
: Truly, an "honorary one of us."
: The way he defends introverts is masterful.
: We see you, Kisaragi.
"…Go outside."
: Betrayed!
: Traitor!
: I'll downvote this!
: How could you!
: Kisaragi's no longer one of us!
: We're stripping you of your "honorary one of us" title.
I don't need that disgraceful title, so go ahead and strip it away. While I am an introvert, I'm not a shut-in who never leaves the house, so calling me "honorary one of us" is just insulting.
"Oh, I can see it now... the stairs leading to the 75th floor."
: So this is the limit of human exploration.
: The limit (officially recorded).
: The limit (but totally a lie).
: The limit (with questionable claims).
: Everything's way too vague.
: This is hilarious.
: The viewers are becoming paranoid, lol.
: Too funny.
"If the 75th floor is the limit, that means they couldn't beat 'it,' right?"
"Yeah, definitely. That means it's that thing."
"There's no real strategy for beating it, after all."
: What's "it" supposed to be?
: Could you please stop with the vague pronouns?
: We need details!
: Classic EXs, speaking in half-finished thoughts.
: Hurry up already.
The comment section was getting impatient, but they'll figure it out once we step inside. There's no point in explaining something that'll become obvious soon, and Kamishiro seems to share that sentiment, ignoring the comments as she happily skips down the stairs.
"Who's fighting it?"
"…Which one of us would you prefer?"
: They're not fighting together?
: Are they some kind of battle tribe?
: Is this some 1v1 ritual? These people are savages.
: EXs are wild.
: EXs' reputation keeps taking hits.
: Asagao is the only one among them who seems normal.
: Terrifying.
"Then you should handle it, Kamishiro."
"If I just jump into the fight, they'll say I'm a battle freak! But fine, I'll do it!"
"You will, right?"
: She actually is a battle freak.
: So it's true.
: Terrifying.
: Dungeon explorers really are just savages.
: Explorers = brutal people confirmed.
: Asagao was a breath of fresh air (nostalgic sigh).
Calling explorers brutal or savages is what the more radical anti-dungeon exploration folks rant about on the internet. These are the same people who spread conspiracy theories, honestly. Kids nowadays learn about dungeons in school, so they're better informed. High schoolers even get detailed history lessons on them. Even middle schoolers know how deeply dungeons impact the economy.
While I chatted idly with the comments, we eventually reached the 75th floor.
"We're here."
"And it's already waiting."
: It's... very flat.
: Looks like the Hachioji Dungeon.
: It's not paved, but the ground is completely flat.
: So, the deep floors have areas like this, too?
: Maybe this is a rest point?
: Did the rank S party make it here and then turn back for a break?
The viewers don't seem to realize it yet, but we've already been spotted. The killing intent is practically palpable, and it won't be long before it shows itself.
Just as I was thinking that, the ground trembled, raising clouds of dust. A massive dragon with an impressive mustache emerged from the yellow-brown earth and soared into the sky. I have no idea how it flies, but its four sharp-clawed legs paddle through the air as if swimming through the dungeon's atmosphere.
"…Still as leisurely as ever."
"Well, I'll just sit back and watch."
: Wait, what?
: You need to explain things!
: Who said this was a rest area!?
: There's no safety in the deep floors, is there?
: Seriously, this is deep floor territory!
: Humans have no business being here.
Hmm... now that I think about it, even regular dungeon explorers might not be able to comprehend a giant dragon emerging from the ground and flying around. When you dive into the deep floors, this kind of thing becomes routine. The monsters in the deep floors are leagues beyond what you find in the lower levels—they're practically otherworldly.
People often say there's a stark difference between the middle and lower floors, but in reality, the gap between the lower and deep floors is on a whole different scale. Monsters on the lower floors are still somewhat biological; you can make sense of their movements. But down here, it's like dealing with creatures straight out of fantasy.
"That's a dragon, isn't it? Like the ones from Chinese mythology."
: Yeah, no kidding!
: You don't need to be a genius to figure that out!
: That's some serious small talk.
: Introvert energy coming in strong.
: Classic awkward introvert.
"…It's a monster that swims through the air using its magic. As some of you might've guessed from the way it emerged from the ground, it can also manipulate the earth with magic. It's a pain to deal with because it attacks from a distance, manipulating the ground under your feet. The best strategy is to hit it with overwhelming firepower from afar."
: He's upset and talking fast now.
: Nerdy, rapid-fire explanation incoming.
: I still don't get it.
: Just go with the flow.
: This is beyond comprehension.
: Magic that lets you swim through the air? What?
I'm not mad, okay? I was just a little irritated and thought I'd mess with the viewers a bit.
And for those who can't understand what it means to "swim through the air with magic"...
"Magic is pretty versatile, so you can do almost anything you set your mind to. Like flying through the air, for example."
"Wait for meee!"
: Uh, what?
: Wait, hold on.
: What is going on?
: What!?
: This makes no sense.
: I'm lost.
: Absolutely no way.
Wait, doesn't every explorer do this?