Sworded Affair

"I\'ve heard corpses make more pleasant noises," The Princess sneered, a glowing hand at her throat projecting her voice across the battlefield, cutting through the instrument\'s din. "It\'s a miracle your horse doesn\'t bolt from it. Give us whatever message your master arranged, then go and leave our ears in peace."

Mercifully, the bugle went away, as the rider guided his steed closer to the castle, stopping right at the edge of the castle wards. Up close, he cut an imposing figure in golden leather; his horse the purest white with a faint glimmer of intelligence behind its ruby eyes.

[Paladin of Hearthome - Level 15]

"His Majesty the King demands the return of his errant daughter! Return to court at once, such that your crimes may earn a reprieve! Surrender the philanderer at once, that he may earn a slow and torturous death for defiling a superior bloodline!"

"No, I don\'t think I\'ll be returning, Paladin." Princess Astaroth smirked. "Not to a man with both feet in the grave; if he\'s not dead already, that is, and you\'re not being fooled by mere smoke and mirrors."

The Princess tilted her head, seemingly in thought as the Paladin waited, unwilling to interrupt for whatever reason.

"That said," The Princess added, sounding rather more conciliatory. "I\'m willing to send you where the philanderer is, if that would be acceptable to you?"

"Indeed!" The Paladin agreed at once, a bloodthirsty grin on his face. "Direct me to him, such that he shall repent for his crimes!"

"The pact has been sealed," Princess Astaroth acknowledged, before snapping her fingers.

Five seconds was all it took to burn the paladin to ash, screaming all the way as flames emerged from within and consumed him entirely; all whilst leaving his horse completely untouched though understandably spooked.

"He seemed pretty tough," Emma remarked as she watched the horse bolt in the opposite direction, desperate to get away from them. "I\'m surprised he died so easily."

"I secured honest agreement with him," The Princess replied impishly. "That let me cut through a lot of his resistances; a good reminder to be careful with your wording, lest you agree to something rather unfortunate."

Unauthorized duplication: this narrative has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

"The man he wanted is already dead?" Emma guessed after a moment\'s thought. "So when you offered to send the Paladin his way..."

"He consented to his own death," The Princess confirmed. "My Warlock class isn\'t just for show; contracts are very much a core element of what I do."

"Noted," Emma snorted. "After that, it\'ll probably take some time before any response arrives. Are you still up for some history lessons?"

"Always."

---

"Well that was a bust," Peter laughed, not sounding too unhappy about it as he watched the Paladin be consumed by flames.

"It had been a long shot to begin with," Jen acknowledged, handing him another beer from the dispenser. "Not sure what the rest were expecting, making such heavy handed demands of the princess. A shame cooler heads didn\'t prevail; a proper healer would\'ve been useful, when our army inevitably goes to storm the castle."

"It may yet come to that, but it\'s far from a certainty," Peter wagged a finger at her, before turning to point it at the screen. "See what I mean?"

The main screen was a frenetic hive of activity; words scrolling past almost faster than he could read. Every conversation currently underway in the theatre was being displayed on that board, a record for posterity of four hundred people arguing about the next steps to take, in the impromptu game Felix dropped on their laps. Peter couldn\'t see the Imperator anywhere in the theatre, but he was definitely paying attention. Technically speaking, only Felix could submit decisions, as the sole link to Scholomance, but he\'d chosen to involve the crowd, implementing an ad-hoc voting system.

People were given time to freely discuss in the theatre, until Felix decided that nothing relevant was being brought forth and all the options had been discussed. When that happened (usually after an hour or so), the most popular suggestions would be selected and put to a blind vote. As the ballots were cast using the System interface, absolute security was assured, and Felix would implement the highest voted option for the next stage of the siege. Currently, Peter could see three distinct camps emerging within the moving mass of text; those who wanted to commit the entire army to a single overwhelming assault, the ones who thought that would just lead to another field full of skeletons and pushed for diplomacy, and the final group of people like Peter and Jen who didn\'t particularly care either way and just wanted a fun time.

"What do you think?" Jen asked. "You\'re the military man here."

"Modern artillery rendered castles obsolete decades ago," Peter laughed. "Not to mention all the magic that I haven\'t got a clue about. Your guess is as good as mine here."

"Eh, whatever happens, it beats more weight training at the gym."

---

"Looks like caution won out in the end," Felix observed, as he read the results of the winning plan. "Probably for the best, really. I\'m not sure what killed the preliminary forces stationed outside the castle, but if it\'s all-or-nothing, then offering them the entire army as a sitting duck would be an awful idea."

Felix would still have done it, had that been the winning vote. He was fortunate, basking in the privilege of having no skin in the game, as the only thing hinging on the outcome for him was an unknown Quest reward. Nice to have, certainly, but also unlikely to be truly important, seeing as it wasn\'t marked as an Administrator Quest like all the ones that had proven significant for his Dungeon.

"As long as everyone has a good time, then it\'s all fine by me," Felix rubbed his hands together. "We\'re getting recordings of every moment, so no matter the outcome, this will be the perfect advertising for our entertainment network, once we\'re ready to expand beyond the Dungeons."

Thus resolved, Felix found himself joining the long list of streamers who throw games for content.